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Hello fellow peoples, I'm updating my about me page so I can sticky this post now that I've figured out how to do that.
I'm Unicornduke or Duke on the internet, I do just journal about my life on here. I do a lot of fiber arts stuff, spinning is my favorite, but also weaving (backstrap loom, four shaft counterbalance loom, tablet weaving), crochet, and knitting. I host a weekly crafting hangout on zoom, the link is posted every Monday morning, or at least by 6pm that day. I also am an avid gardener and seed saver.
Baking is another passion and I have to be gluten free and I'm happy to share recipes if you want any. Watching women's hockey is also a hobby and thankfully seasonal opposite my busy season. I'm no longer In Fandom the way I used to be, but occasionally wander into fanfics and that's about it. I used to be on tumblr until 2018ish and then tumblr deleted my account. I'm not sad about it.
I'm also trans and non-binary (they/them or he/him) and I'm still figuring out how to navigate all that in my head and in the world.
I farm full time now, plus some side jobs in rural PA.
I'm always happy to chat and meet new friends!
(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2026 12:50 pmHey all, if you'd like to join the crafting hangout, it is tonight from 6-8pm ET!
Video encouraged but not required!
Topic: Crafting Hangout
Time: Mondays 6:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meeting
Meeting ID: 973 2674 2763
hey ho off to work we go
Sep. 13th, 2026 05:36 pmas of right now, we have harvested 25 bins (the big watermelon bins you see during summer are short bins that we use for small or delicate things, we pick regular pumpkins into tall bins which are four feet tall, both short and tall bins are the square footage of a pallet) of things from one field. this is fantastic. they are the specialty stuff, so tiny pumpkins, gourds, hubbards, edible squashes like delicata, acorn, spaghetti, the neat storage watermelon, white pumpkins, tiny white pumpkins, warty things, etc etc. I'm pleased with our progress picking and this coming week we'll start picking the full size pumpkins since they weren't quite ready yet. The stems were still soft. The biggest issue with all these bins is storage. I cleaned out the heifer shed which has a rough concrete floor and stuffed 10 bins in there, there's 10 in the old pole barn and another five actually in our selling area. there's a small tent we put up for storage and we stage bins in one grass area and cover them with plastic to protect the cardboard. however. I still need to clear and mow those areas, so I can't store bins there yet. that's my high priority for tuesday.
This coming week I'm focusing on selling area setup with the goal that my employees will do a bunch of the tedious bits this coming weekend (setting up the string maze, laying out the parking lot lines, etc). I'm hoping to spend at least 2 hours every day this week harvesting pumpkins which should be 3-4 tall bins every day working by myself and up to eight with another person on the days I have employees.
This year has been a real eye opener in terms of what work I'm not thrilled with having to do. A big one is being the customer facing person for everything. I don't mind making decisions on tasks even if my prioritization could use some work, I don't mind doing the work, long hours etc. I don't even mind managing employees even if I know I'm not that good at it (mostly the chit chat and I dunno, being personable? ugh). But there's something about having to call and email people all the time that drives me nuts.
I'm actually doing quite well mentally, we moved my parents laundry machines and dressers over to their house last night and moved the washer from their place over to mine plus the extra dryer from the rental which we don't actually know if it works. I have no idea really where it came from or what the story is. the renters do have a dryer. shrugs. if it doesn't work, I have a clothesline. I feel really settled, it's amazing. I knew I was struggling with limbo but this is truly amazing how much better I feel now that the difficult roommates are out. They aren't really difficult, we just aren't compatible as roommates.
I am in fall mode, which means that I can't make my saturday night hangouts with Jade which stinks because I'll miss her but she got a very ominous email from her work on thursday that makes it sound (to my ear) that there might have been some sort of very bad fraud/money problems but no further details other than they aren't getting new clients starting monday. so she's really worried about having a job come monday. she's in good shape as far as having savings for a few months but she's in limbo which is really not good and no one, even the regional director of her area knows what's happening so big yikes. so I'm going to try and check in with her via text more than we usually do during the week. I did show her my completed shawl (separate post about that) and she thought it was cool, so I offered it to her and she wants it so it has a good home already!
tomorrows tasks are calling people who might be interested in working for us to round out our register people, emails and running to wegmans for specialty baking supplies, then making food. there's so much good produce right now, so I'm going to be making roasted delicata squash and chickpeas plus brown rice and maybe some ground turkey. plus sweet corn and jalapeno. I forgot how much I like a sauteed corn and jalapeno side. so good. need more fruit too. baking is going to be a double batch of chocolate chip cookies, pita breads and something else tasty for this week. I'm not thrilled with how few things I have baked and in the freezer but so be it. I also need to stock up on some staples like ketchup which I use infrequently but given I'm currently eating chicken nuggets and tatertots plain right now, I do need them.
This coming week I'm focusing on selling area setup with the goal that my employees will do a bunch of the tedious bits this coming weekend (setting up the string maze, laying out the parking lot lines, etc). I'm hoping to spend at least 2 hours every day this week harvesting pumpkins which should be 3-4 tall bins every day working by myself and up to eight with another person on the days I have employees.
This year has been a real eye opener in terms of what work I'm not thrilled with having to do. A big one is being the customer facing person for everything. I don't mind making decisions on tasks even if my prioritization could use some work, I don't mind doing the work, long hours etc. I don't even mind managing employees even if I know I'm not that good at it (mostly the chit chat and I dunno, being personable? ugh). But there's something about having to call and email people all the time that drives me nuts.
I'm actually doing quite well mentally, we moved my parents laundry machines and dressers over to their house last night and moved the washer from their place over to mine plus the extra dryer from the rental which we don't actually know if it works. I have no idea really where it came from or what the story is. the renters do have a dryer. shrugs. if it doesn't work, I have a clothesline. I feel really settled, it's amazing. I knew I was struggling with limbo but this is truly amazing how much better I feel now that the difficult roommates are out. They aren't really difficult, we just aren't compatible as roommates.
I am in fall mode, which means that I can't make my saturday night hangouts with Jade which stinks because I'll miss her but she got a very ominous email from her work on thursday that makes it sound (to my ear) that there might have been some sort of very bad fraud/money problems but no further details other than they aren't getting new clients starting monday. so she's really worried about having a job come monday. she's in good shape as far as having savings for a few months but she's in limbo which is really not good and no one, even the regional director of her area knows what's happening so big yikes. so I'm going to try and check in with her via text more than we usually do during the week. I did show her my completed shawl (separate post about that) and she thought it was cool, so I offered it to her and she wants it so it has a good home already!
tomorrows tasks are calling people who might be interested in working for us to round out our register people, emails and running to wegmans for specialty baking supplies, then making food. there's so much good produce right now, so I'm going to be making roasted delicata squash and chickpeas plus brown rice and maybe some ground turkey. plus sweet corn and jalapeno. I forgot how much I like a sauteed corn and jalapeno side. so good. need more fruit too. baking is going to be a double batch of chocolate chip cookies, pita breads and something else tasty for this week. I'm not thrilled with how few things I have baked and in the freezer but so be it. I also need to stock up on some staples like ketchup which I use infrequently but given I'm currently eating chicken nuggets and tatertots plain right now, I do need them.
(no subject)
Sep. 7th, 2026 03:56 pmCrafting link is the post before this one
I have found the perfect kitchen island. It is $700. jesus.
It is the correct height, it has shelves on one side and room for tall stools on the other. It isn't too big for the kitchen space I have but nice amount of countertop for putting baking sheets. It doesn't have a fold out panel but I think that's okay. Wood top. I wish it wasn't black but that's not world ending. But ugh 700 dollars is a lot. I suspect I'll think about it for a while and then get it in december or something. It's a trip to get to the nearest ikea anyway, the closest one is at the base of the turnpike, so a nice easy 2 hour drive.
Today I made pita bread, chocolate chip cookies and jalapeno corn muffins. Tried a new chocolate chip recipe and it made amazingly puffy cookies, which has always been my gripe with gluten free cookies is how flat they end up. Plus they have a lot of chocolate.
I've been contemplating the fact that I might be able to actually get all my baking supplies back in the kitchen soon? Like, in the next week!? I might be able to find my cutting boards and cookie dough scoop which are the things I've been missing a lot. We are probably moving my parents bedroom over to the new place in the next two or three days, then I asked my mom to focus on kitchen cabinets. I think the washer and dryer will go over, apparently the dryer that is over there is broken, so I told them to just get rid of it and if a dryer comes up on facebook cheap, great and if not, I have a clothesline. Do I know where my clothespins are? no clue.
My sister's friends came into town this weekend and they were a delight, we did a campfire cookout saturday night which was great and a good time. But I had been doing late night/early morning spraying for several days in a row and then yesterday had to do early morning and late night spraying so I skipped the campfire cookout at my uncle's orchard which is normally a great time. But I was so tired and annoyed that I just stayed home. I did chat with my aunt and uncle at the stand when I ran down for corn this morning, so that was something. And I'll see some of them at the party for an hour tonight before crafting. This is too much parties. why have we crammed them all in one weekend augh. something something holiday - my family is a lot of self employed or retired people, we don't need to do this.
The good news is that I'm mostly done spraying for the season, I'll have to hit the fall raspberries with an insecticide a couple of times (swd are a curse) but otherwise, we're done with spraying thank goodness. I'm still not good at it. We are harvesting pumpkins already but focusing on the white pumpkins specifically. When the leaf cover of the plants die, the white pumpkins are exposed to the sun and they will turn yellowish if they are left in the field. thankfully, we have a lot of pumpkins, I'm so glad. I think we are finally wrangling the staffing under control, the admin and event work is hard for me to keep up with. someday I will hire someone for this.
Yesterday at the end of the day, we just about emptied the neighbors accursed trailer of hay bales. that sucked so bad. never ever store haybales in a tractor trailer trailer for an unknown amount of years. the ones left after yesterday are bad (got wet from trailer wall leaking), bad strings broke, one small stack that had a bird nest on the top but also a snake that wasn't running away while I was working near it and one small stack that had a wasp nest in the top bale. this was mostly a favor to the neighbor. my dad arranged all this but me and the workers did the actual work. it sucked shit. no ventilation or cross wind so I worked in the very back throwing bales from the stack to an employee who tossed onto the trailer, stacked by the teenage employee. We did 115 bales in about an hour with four breaks to let the dust settle and to rinse our mouths out. nasty. the bales we took are in good shape, we'll sell them or use them especially since we aren't baling our own these days. but also fucking ew.
I finished a big spinning project this morning, super pleased with it and I need to do some ~*weaving math*~ because it will be singles for weaving! I need to get pictures and make a post about it too.
I have found the perfect kitchen island. It is $700. jesus.
It is the correct height, it has shelves on one side and room for tall stools on the other. It isn't too big for the kitchen space I have but nice amount of countertop for putting baking sheets. It doesn't have a fold out panel but I think that's okay. Wood top. I wish it wasn't black but that's not world ending. But ugh 700 dollars is a lot. I suspect I'll think about it for a while and then get it in december or something. It's a trip to get to the nearest ikea anyway, the closest one is at the base of the turnpike, so a nice easy 2 hour drive.
Today I made pita bread, chocolate chip cookies and jalapeno corn muffins. Tried a new chocolate chip recipe and it made amazingly puffy cookies, which has always been my gripe with gluten free cookies is how flat they end up. Plus they have a lot of chocolate.
I've been contemplating the fact that I might be able to actually get all my baking supplies back in the kitchen soon? Like, in the next week!? I might be able to find my cutting boards and cookie dough scoop which are the things I've been missing a lot. We are probably moving my parents bedroom over to the new place in the next two or three days, then I asked my mom to focus on kitchen cabinets. I think the washer and dryer will go over, apparently the dryer that is over there is broken, so I told them to just get rid of it and if a dryer comes up on facebook cheap, great and if not, I have a clothesline. Do I know where my clothespins are? no clue.
My sister's friends came into town this weekend and they were a delight, we did a campfire cookout saturday night which was great and a good time. But I had been doing late night/early morning spraying for several days in a row and then yesterday had to do early morning and late night spraying so I skipped the campfire cookout at my uncle's orchard which is normally a great time. But I was so tired and annoyed that I just stayed home. I did chat with my aunt and uncle at the stand when I ran down for corn this morning, so that was something. And I'll see some of them at the party for an hour tonight before crafting. This is too much parties. why have we crammed them all in one weekend augh. something something holiday - my family is a lot of self employed or retired people, we don't need to do this.
The good news is that I'm mostly done spraying for the season, I'll have to hit the fall raspberries with an insecticide a couple of times (swd are a curse) but otherwise, we're done with spraying thank goodness. I'm still not good at it. We are harvesting pumpkins already but focusing on the white pumpkins specifically. When the leaf cover of the plants die, the white pumpkins are exposed to the sun and they will turn yellowish if they are left in the field. thankfully, we have a lot of pumpkins, I'm so glad. I think we are finally wrangling the staffing under control, the admin and event work is hard for me to keep up with. someday I will hire someone for this.
Yesterday at the end of the day, we just about emptied the neighbors accursed trailer of hay bales. that sucked so bad. never ever store haybales in a tractor trailer trailer for an unknown amount of years. the ones left after yesterday are bad (got wet from trailer wall leaking), bad strings broke, one small stack that had a bird nest on the top but also a snake that wasn't running away while I was working near it and one small stack that had a wasp nest in the top bale. this was mostly a favor to the neighbor. my dad arranged all this but me and the workers did the actual work. it sucked shit. no ventilation or cross wind so I worked in the very back throwing bales from the stack to an employee who tossed onto the trailer, stacked by the teenage employee. We did 115 bales in about an hour with four breaks to let the dust settle and to rinse our mouths out. nasty. the bales we took are in good shape, we'll sell them or use them especially since we aren't baling our own these days. but also fucking ew.
I finished a big spinning project this morning, super pleased with it and I need to do some ~*weaving math*~ because it will be singles for weaving! I need to get pictures and make a post about it too.
Things are happening
Sep. 3rd, 2026 10:18 amMonday I made a trip to Target to get some things. Most urgent was a trash can and it turns out I have Opinions on trash cans. Also I didn't remember that college move in weekend was last weekend and Target didn't have an Ideal Trashcan. I picked up many other important things (Dish dryer, silverware organizer, some other things), then hit up home depot to get an ideal trash can, which they had along with a retractable clothes line. Important stuff. I treated myself by going to wegmans and I got gluten free pizzeles, which I've been munching on. Tasty!
My mom has been making lots of progress since the weekend. Not sure what happened to get her moving starting on tuesday but she has emptied multiple cabinets and cleared a ton of her stuff from the pantry. I have been able to put my food into a kitchen cabinet (yay!) and have a plan for where dishes and baking supplies will go. I am on the hunt for a kitchen island, which hasn't been going that well because I have Opinions on that. I have a suspicion I may end up modifying one to my wishes but we'll see. I previously thought I needed it wheeled but now that I'm thinking about it, maybe I don't need that. Hmm. But I want it to be sturdy, have storage underneath for baking dishes or misc appliances (ice cream maker, etc) and have a big fold out panel. The big fold out panel is the real problem, it would need a swing out leg and all the ones that I'd been looking at were quite small due to the wheeled plan. But maybe if I don't need wheeled, it would be easier to find something. Hmm.
I have placed my appliances on the counter tops so now I once again have my beloved toaster oven and stand mixer easily available to use. I am feeling very good about things. I suspect my mom is not, she spent some time freaking out this morning but productively? I dunno. My sister and her friends are coming into town this weekend, so there is a lot of stuff happening everywhere.
We had a hell of a storm come through last night, the lightning was amazing. But in the end, it was just over an inch of rain, so not bad at all! We didn't get super high winds either. I pulled the pumps before going to bed, so I was happy. It was hard to fall asleep though. I'm doing computer data entry work this morning, then some mowing and woodsplitting this afternoon and making dinner tonight, possibly baking a snack since I can!
My mom has been making lots of progress since the weekend. Not sure what happened to get her moving starting on tuesday but she has emptied multiple cabinets and cleared a ton of her stuff from the pantry. I have been able to put my food into a kitchen cabinet (yay!) and have a plan for where dishes and baking supplies will go. I am on the hunt for a kitchen island, which hasn't been going that well because I have Opinions on that. I have a suspicion I may end up modifying one to my wishes but we'll see. I previously thought I needed it wheeled but now that I'm thinking about it, maybe I don't need that. Hmm. But I want it to be sturdy, have storage underneath for baking dishes or misc appliances (ice cream maker, etc) and have a big fold out panel. The big fold out panel is the real problem, it would need a swing out leg and all the ones that I'd been looking at were quite small due to the wheeled plan. But maybe if I don't need wheeled, it would be easier to find something. Hmm.
I have placed my appliances on the counter tops so now I once again have my beloved toaster oven and stand mixer easily available to use. I am feeling very good about things. I suspect my mom is not, she spent some time freaking out this morning but productively? I dunno. My sister and her friends are coming into town this weekend, so there is a lot of stuff happening everywhere.
We had a hell of a storm come through last night, the lightning was amazing. But in the end, it was just over an inch of rain, so not bad at all! We didn't get super high winds either. I pulled the pumps before going to bed, so I was happy. It was hard to fall asleep though. I'm doing computer data entry work this morning, then some mowing and woodsplitting this afternoon and making dinner tonight, possibly baking a snack since I can!
I have a working fridge!
Aug. 28th, 2026 01:29 pmHooray!
I had been storing all of my cold things in the fridge over at the church and just, driving over there 2-3 times a day to get my food. The urge to not do that was very strong, be proud of me, I have been eating adequately anyway. I had been keeping an eye on FB marketplace for several days, waiting for my dad to be free, which was after all his buddies finally left. I was being very patient.
Once he said he was free yesterday, I messaged one person on FB who had a decent looking fridge for $150 in the town 15 mins away. He messaged back right away, we went over at 6pm. A very nice college age woman met us there and she jumped in to help us load which went well. She was nice and we chatted a bit, then headed home. Had to take the doors off to get it in and it needed another little cleaning before use. I plugged it in before pulling the old one out because I have been burned before, but it was down below 40F within two hours or something. Fantastic.
This morning, I got the stuff out of the freezer of the old one, yanked it out, got the new one in place and then fetched my breakfast and all my food from the church and I'm now eating food in my house like a normal person.
I'll admit, the fridge is huge for my needs but it's an old maytag, it's simple, it works, I'm happy with it.
Now if only my mother would actually pack the fucking kitchen up. On Sunday, I asked her to start working on it since they have a perfectly acceptable kitchen at the other house. I fetched her a folding table so she could put things on it. Zero boxes have been packed so far, but don't worry it's on her list for today supposedly. And Wed, she tried to convince me to buy a new fridge instead of a used one and apparently had spent time browsing labor day sales. sigh. deeply unhelpful. I understand she wants to be helpful, but she is not being helpful in a way that I want or have asked for. This is a running theme.
I had been storing all of my cold things in the fridge over at the church and just, driving over there 2-3 times a day to get my food. The urge to not do that was very strong, be proud of me, I have been eating adequately anyway. I had been keeping an eye on FB marketplace for several days, waiting for my dad to be free, which was after all his buddies finally left. I was being very patient.
Once he said he was free yesterday, I messaged one person on FB who had a decent looking fridge for $150 in the town 15 mins away. He messaged back right away, we went over at 6pm. A very nice college age woman met us there and she jumped in to help us load which went well. She was nice and we chatted a bit, then headed home. Had to take the doors off to get it in and it needed another little cleaning before use. I plugged it in before pulling the old one out because I have been burned before, but it was down below 40F within two hours or something. Fantastic.
This morning, I got the stuff out of the freezer of the old one, yanked it out, got the new one in place and then fetched my breakfast and all my food from the church and I'm now eating food in my house like a normal person.
I'll admit, the fridge is huge for my needs but it's an old maytag, it's simple, it works, I'm happy with it.
Now if only my mother would actually pack the fucking kitchen up. On Sunday, I asked her to start working on it since they have a perfectly acceptable kitchen at the other house. I fetched her a folding table so she could put things on it. Zero boxes have been packed so far, but don't worry it's on her list for today supposedly. And Wed, she tried to convince me to buy a new fridge instead of a used one and apparently had spent time browsing labor day sales. sigh. deeply unhelpful. I understand she wants to be helpful, but she is not being helpful in a way that I want or have asked for. This is a running theme.
perhaps I have been tired all the time because I haven't been eating enough food. I made a full meal tonight, rice, curry chicken, carrots, jalapeno and corn salsa and ate a dinner probably twice as large as what I've eating in the past month and more typically of what I used to eat. If I had thought about it more, I'd add more chickpeas.
sigh. this makes sense. I honestly can't remember the last time I actually cooked a real meal and now I have food for the week.
sigh. this makes sense. I honestly can't remember the last time I actually cooked a real meal and now I have food for the week.
Last Sunday, we moved the dishwasher and fridge from my house over to my parents house. This went mostly fine. We have a dolly and a forkable metal platform that freaking rules for moving appliances since you can set it right at the level of the porch and pull the dolly right on. We had to remove both the kitchen door and the doors from the fridge to get theirs out and also we made a nice wet mess unhooking the dishwasher. Oh well.
In the transfer, my dad accidentally took a part along with the dishwasher that hooked up to the drain pipe that he shouldn't have, we hooked it up at their place, which was a little odd but seemed fine and didn't leak and then pushed the dishwasher in place which was a big pain. Those new floors. But then we came back and tried to hook up my dishwasher and realized we didn't have the right connectors and that one connector end must be under the difficult to remove dishwasher. Oh well I said. No biggie, I probably won't use it much except if I have guests. Plenty of time to get a part.
Then we moved their fridge over no problem, brought mine in and hooked it up. Now my dad had plugged it in while it was in the pole barn and said it felt cold. And it does. But only to 45-50 degrees. Freezer works fine. But this was Monday morning, I was so tired that I said fuck it and gave up. My dad clearly felt bad and offered to bring the fridge from the church over but that would require getting it up 8 big stairs out of the church basement and then putting it back later after I got a new fridge. No. I just shoved all of my cold stuff into the fridge at the church, baked blueberry bars during crafting to take with me and hit the road tuesday afternoon.
Except. Part of the reason I felt so tired and like trash is that I had a UTI. Thankfully, my mom offered to cover the register Tuesday morning since my normal employee wasn't available and I took myself to urgent care. She offered so I could get on the road earlier, but I was so grateful that I could make the trip to the nice urgent care and got seen immediately. (weirdest part of the whole visit was the PA came in and asked me if I was male or female right off the bat. weird but fine I guess????)
Got my drugs, finished packing and hit the road for real this time and arrived to the friend's farm just as they were sitting down to eat pizza dinner. B had texted to get my order and they had gluten free pizza, yay. Plus watermelon. Thinking how much watermelon I ate this trip now definitely did well for helping with the UTI. It was so lovely, there was a big group of the farmworkers sitting around and chatting and I got to reconnect with some folks I knew before and met some new and interesting people. Then I set up my tent near B's cabin, we chatted for a bit and then I went to sleep.
Wed was a day of rest for me. B had work still, so she did her thing, but I laid around, napped, drank water, read books and fanfic and did a lot of nothing. At this point, my appetite was so shot from stress from the last few weeks that I ate a blueberry biscuit for breakfast at 10am which is normally when I eat my second snack of the day and wasn't super interested in it. I did have to check work emails, update picking conditions etc but it was a half hour of work at most. It was so nice to just hang out with people as they came in and out, took breaks, ate slow lunch of two small slices of leftover pizza that I wasnt at all interested in, waved to them in passing, talked shit about farming. B made tacos that night which I sorta helped with and they were delicious.
Thursday, I was already feeling better, I was eating more, I was more relaxed and more cheerful, most of the day was me laying around more. I went and picked up arepas from town for dinner. We went that night to Tanglewood in Western MA, the drive was easy and not too long and saw the Silksong Ensemble featuring Rhiannon Giddens. It was incredible. The music was freaking amazing and the musicians were incredible. It was very much an ensemble mostly not focused on her even though the advertising said Rhiannon Giddens featuring Silksong Ensemble. I feel this is good marketing to get people to come. I don't even care, it was so good. I'd say music genre was folk music but enhanced by all the different instruments they had in the ensemble. Really really good. Highly recommend if you can see them. Didn't even have to wear earplugs! We were back by 11.
Friday I hit the road mid morning. I had time to pack all my stuff up including drying my tent out since it had rained a little the night before. I stopped by the co-op to buy fancy cheese as a gift and then went and visited C about an hour west. It was so good to see her again and she fed me tacos. We walked around the farm, chatted all the work things that had changed since I left and I gave some advice on a project that they didn't know how to handle since the person in charge had left but I had done all the work on it. I got to snuggle her little weirdo dogs. She gave me a large quantity of sweet corn that I need to process tomorrow and I hit the road.
I got home around 6:30pm, helped my parents with a bunch of stuff that night and went to bed early. While I was gone, my parents made a ton of progress on their house and the first of my dad's guests arrived yesterday midday. My mom didn't want to be around their silly nonsense so she's back at my place while they're there. Not that they moved their bedroom over anyway. Sat morning I also helped them do a bunch of stuff to get ready since they needed help.
My house is a fucking disaster zone but I'm much refreshed, all out of fucks to give and browsing facebook marketplace for a nice cheap fridge, of which there are many. I might be able to wrangle things cleaner tomorrow but who's to say. My mom has just piled shit all over the place in here and I don't care. It is so not my problem right now. I've given up and am using paper plates and plastic utensils like I'm in the middle of a move. My trash can is the trash bag tied to a shelf. I do have the brain capacity to start compiling a list of all the things I will need to buy in the next few weeks so things will be happening.
It was such a good trip though and I super needed it. Next year, I need to do this at the end of July because this was too long to wait for a break. B wanted to pay me back for the tickets to the concert but I asked her to visit this winter instead which she promised to do. It was so nice to see and chat with friends. Ugh, so good. I missed them all so much.
In the transfer, my dad accidentally took a part along with the dishwasher that hooked up to the drain pipe that he shouldn't have, we hooked it up at their place, which was a little odd but seemed fine and didn't leak and then pushed the dishwasher in place which was a big pain. Those new floors. But then we came back and tried to hook up my dishwasher and realized we didn't have the right connectors and that one connector end must be under the difficult to remove dishwasher. Oh well I said. No biggie, I probably won't use it much except if I have guests. Plenty of time to get a part.
Then we moved their fridge over no problem, brought mine in and hooked it up. Now my dad had plugged it in while it was in the pole barn and said it felt cold. And it does. But only to 45-50 degrees. Freezer works fine. But this was Monday morning, I was so tired that I said fuck it and gave up. My dad clearly felt bad and offered to bring the fridge from the church over but that would require getting it up 8 big stairs out of the church basement and then putting it back later after I got a new fridge. No. I just shoved all of my cold stuff into the fridge at the church, baked blueberry bars during crafting to take with me and hit the road tuesday afternoon.
Except. Part of the reason I felt so tired and like trash is that I had a UTI. Thankfully, my mom offered to cover the register Tuesday morning since my normal employee wasn't available and I took myself to urgent care. She offered so I could get on the road earlier, but I was so grateful that I could make the trip to the nice urgent care and got seen immediately. (weirdest part of the whole visit was the PA came in and asked me if I was male or female right off the bat. weird but fine I guess????)
Got my drugs, finished packing and hit the road for real this time and arrived to the friend's farm just as they were sitting down to eat pizza dinner. B had texted to get my order and they had gluten free pizza, yay. Plus watermelon. Thinking how much watermelon I ate this trip now definitely did well for helping with the UTI. It was so lovely, there was a big group of the farmworkers sitting around and chatting and I got to reconnect with some folks I knew before and met some new and interesting people. Then I set up my tent near B's cabin, we chatted for a bit and then I went to sleep.
Wed was a day of rest for me. B had work still, so she did her thing, but I laid around, napped, drank water, read books and fanfic and did a lot of nothing. At this point, my appetite was so shot from stress from the last few weeks that I ate a blueberry biscuit for breakfast at 10am which is normally when I eat my second snack of the day and wasn't super interested in it. I did have to check work emails, update picking conditions etc but it was a half hour of work at most. It was so nice to just hang out with people as they came in and out, took breaks, ate slow lunch of two small slices of leftover pizza that I wasnt at all interested in, waved to them in passing, talked shit about farming. B made tacos that night which I sorta helped with and they were delicious.
Thursday, I was already feeling better, I was eating more, I was more relaxed and more cheerful, most of the day was me laying around more. I went and picked up arepas from town for dinner. We went that night to Tanglewood in Western MA, the drive was easy and not too long and saw the Silksong Ensemble featuring Rhiannon Giddens. It was incredible. The music was freaking amazing and the musicians were incredible. It was very much an ensemble mostly not focused on her even though the advertising said Rhiannon Giddens featuring Silksong Ensemble. I feel this is good marketing to get people to come. I don't even care, it was so good. I'd say music genre was folk music but enhanced by all the different instruments they had in the ensemble. Really really good. Highly recommend if you can see them. Didn't even have to wear earplugs! We were back by 11.
Friday I hit the road mid morning. I had time to pack all my stuff up including drying my tent out since it had rained a little the night before. I stopped by the co-op to buy fancy cheese as a gift and then went and visited C about an hour west. It was so good to see her again and she fed me tacos. We walked around the farm, chatted all the work things that had changed since I left and I gave some advice on a project that they didn't know how to handle since the person in charge had left but I had done all the work on it. I got to snuggle her little weirdo dogs. She gave me a large quantity of sweet corn that I need to process tomorrow and I hit the road.
I got home around 6:30pm, helped my parents with a bunch of stuff that night and went to bed early. While I was gone, my parents made a ton of progress on their house and the first of my dad's guests arrived yesterday midday. My mom didn't want to be around their silly nonsense so she's back at my place while they're there. Not that they moved their bedroom over anyway. Sat morning I also helped them do a bunch of stuff to get ready since they needed help.
My house is a fucking disaster zone but I'm much refreshed, all out of fucks to give and browsing facebook marketplace for a nice cheap fridge, of which there are many. I might be able to wrangle things cleaner tomorrow but who's to say. My mom has just piled shit all over the place in here and I don't care. It is so not my problem right now. I've given up and am using paper plates and plastic utensils like I'm in the middle of a move. My trash can is the trash bag tied to a shelf. I do have the brain capacity to start compiling a list of all the things I will need to buy in the next few weeks so things will be happening.
It was such a good trip though and I super needed it. Next year, I need to do this at the end of July because this was too long to wait for a break. B wanted to pay me back for the tickets to the concert but I asked her to visit this winter instead which she promised to do. It was so nice to see and chat with friends. Ugh, so good. I missed them all so much.
(no subject)
Aug. 16th, 2026 07:17 amBack in may, I bought tickets to a concert to see with B for this coming week. end of august, great time to get a break before things get really busy
ha
hahaha
technically true
I am leaving tues afternoon as soon as we close to drive to NY and my to do list is so long. and also I have to take work stuff with me because my parents are really for reals moving this week as in. the kitchen stuff is being moved this afternoon and my mom will spend all week cleaning so can't fully take things back over. I still don't know if the fridge in the barn works. She at least agreed to open and close the register wed and fri mornings around my employees working. I am coming back fri afternoon but arrange to have someone work the fri evening hours because I'll be so tired.
my dad's college buddies are coming to visit starting saturday. he had a cold last week that I caught just enough to make me really tired. I'm dreaming about the farm now which isn't helping with the sleep/tired situation
in related news, my mom asked before going into my room, I told her don't and I would look for the thing, she went into my room anyway so why'd she even fucking bother to ask
my brain kinda wants to explode a little. I have 13 things on my work to do list, three that will take under an hour. 5-8 things on my personal to do list depending on what I have time to do. augh
ETA: it started raining around noon and hasn't stopped yet knocked a bunch of things off my to do list and I took a nap instead which I needed
ha
hahaha
technically true
I am leaving tues afternoon as soon as we close to drive to NY and my to do list is so long. and also I have to take work stuff with me because my parents are really for reals moving this week as in. the kitchen stuff is being moved this afternoon and my mom will spend all week cleaning so can't fully take things back over. I still don't know if the fridge in the barn works. She at least agreed to open and close the register wed and fri mornings around my employees working. I am coming back fri afternoon but arrange to have someone work the fri evening hours because I'll be so tired.
my dad's college buddies are coming to visit starting saturday. he had a cold last week that I caught just enough to make me really tired. I'm dreaming about the farm now which isn't helping with the sleep/tired situation
in related news, my mom asked before going into my room, I told her don't and I would look for the thing, she went into my room anyway so why'd she even fucking bother to ask
my brain kinda wants to explode a little. I have 13 things on my work to do list, three that will take under an hour. 5-8 things on my personal to do list depending on what I have time to do. augh
ETA: it started raining around noon and hasn't stopped yet knocked a bunch of things off my to do list and I took a nap instead which I needed
several things make a post
Aug. 11th, 2026 02:58 pmI got some spraying done in the pumpkins last night, stayed up late so we don't murder the bees. In the middle, one of my eyes got itchy, I had stopped driving the tractor to make sure it wasn't spray drift in my eyes, it didn't seem to be and my eye stopped itching, so I moved on. This morning when I got up, my eye felt fine until I was on register. Then it felt like there was an eyelash in it. Once I got off register, I took a look and my eye had a red spot to the side of my pupil enough that it was right where my eyelids connect. Itching itching itching. So I called an eye doctor and got an appointment.
That was at 1pm, so right in the middle of the day. I got a lot of computer work done, emailing customers, texting people about fall availability, making up spray sheets. Went to the appointment, the doctor was super nice and super cheerful. She asked all the questions, looked at my eyeball for several minutes and told me there probably had been something stuck in it, but it was out. Hell yeah. I have a full body shiver kind of horror of eye injury or things in my eyes, so this was very good. I now have medicated eye drops and I've got work to do this afternoon.
My laptop keyboard has been failing for a while, first the number keys and last weekend, the s key started failing but erratically, sometimes it would fail to type and sometimes it would type twice. Made it hard to play video games. So I finally caved and got a new bluetooth keyboard which I like quite a bit. I can hold it on my lap and type which I like a lot. It means I can wiggle my chair around while I type.
I have switched from testosterone injections to a gel that I apply once a day and omg it is so much better. I like it way way better. One of my great strengths is consistency and I love doing something everyday. It's easy to apply and it is a alcohol based gel so it smells intensely but isn't a terrible texture. The injections, I struggled with doing them when I was stressed, I'd skip them instead which is not ideal. So I'm pleased with this. I can't tell if the current ravenous hunger is related or something to do with the weather. In the last few months, I have been bouncing between absolutely starving all the time and fully not hungry at all. There doesn't seem to be a pattern but a smart person would write things down to see. Hmm, no smart people around here.
That was at 1pm, so right in the middle of the day. I got a lot of computer work done, emailing customers, texting people about fall availability, making up spray sheets. Went to the appointment, the doctor was super nice and super cheerful. She asked all the questions, looked at my eyeball for several minutes and told me there probably had been something stuck in it, but it was out. Hell yeah. I have a full body shiver kind of horror of eye injury or things in my eyes, so this was very good. I now have medicated eye drops and I've got work to do this afternoon.
My laptop keyboard has been failing for a while, first the number keys and last weekend, the s key started failing but erratically, sometimes it would fail to type and sometimes it would type twice. Made it hard to play video games. So I finally caved and got a new bluetooth keyboard which I like quite a bit. I can hold it on my lap and type which I like a lot. It means I can wiggle my chair around while I type.
I have switched from testosterone injections to a gel that I apply once a day and omg it is so much better. I like it way way better. One of my great strengths is consistency and I love doing something everyday. It's easy to apply and it is a alcohol based gel so it smells intensely but isn't a terrible texture. The injections, I struggled with doing them when I was stressed, I'd skip them instead which is not ideal. So I'm pleased with this. I can't tell if the current ravenous hunger is related or something to do with the weather. In the last few months, I have been bouncing between absolutely starving all the time and fully not hungry at all. There doesn't seem to be a pattern but a smart person would write things down to see. Hmm, no smart people around here.
My parents have ordered a stove which is coming tomorrow. No clue really what that means for moving order, apparently the kitchen wasn't actually done being painted? I have no idea. But I told them I could help an hour a day with moving stuff so that's the plan there. Getting my bed dug out didn't take that long thankfully and now I have even more space than expected in my bedroom because there was an extra bedframe and mattress under and next to my bed. Apparently my dad was trying to empty the bookshelf in my room because they specifically want the shelf for something. Another "big priority" is digging the ping pong table out of the shed. You know, the shed that still contains a lot of my belongings that are stacked in front of the pingpong table. I'm sure I will need to be involved with that but honestly, this is reaping what we've sown here. I reiterated that I am here to carry heavy things and I will not have any opinions on where things go or anything like that.
Okay, off I go
they are finally moving
Aug. 10th, 2026 09:46 amyes, it is happening, my parents are finally moving. with incredible efficiency never before shown, they got the flooring done this past week. My dad sanded the floor in a weekend with a giant sander he rented and then all the seal and finish layers were done by Wed, plus 3 days of curing.
we moved the living room stuff yesterday, my dad had decided to pack the books in my room last night for some baffling reason. Apparently he and mom were having miscommunications on what was going over when. I really really didn't want him doing this since my belongings are mixed in with their stuff in my room, so there's a big risk of them packing my stuff up with theirs and then I'll never see it again. I think I've convinced them to not touch my room. Current task is for me to clean my room enough that we can get the bedframe out since it is their bedframe and mine is over at their house, so we need to swap them. to be fair, my bedframe is very low since I have a boxspring so them continuing to use the low frame for their mattress doesn't make sense. it would be for a guest bed, not their bed. they are using a shit mattress from an eternity ago, I don't know if I'll ever convince them to get a new one. no idea where the fuck I'm putting any of my shit to make this happen.
so yay task for me. I think I convinced them to leave the kitchen stuff alone until my mom orders a new stove because my dad wanted to swap the dishwashers today for some reason??? I don't know. He really wants to move everything at once, but is not thinking logically or reasonably about it at all. we may move the fridge over today which means I'll need to go get the fridge from the pole barn. it's been out there since we ripped the floor out of their house in Jan of last year. so who knows what condition it's in.
they want some stuff moved over for my dad's college buddies coming to visit the weekend of the 22nd but not too much. my dad wanted to get the foosball table out of the basement, I told him absolutely fucking not. truly no idea what is happening and I'm too tired for this. I will simply show up to pick up heavy things. like great, they are finally doing the thing but holy fuck is it happening with maximum chaos.
oh also I got to say quote Chris Fleming's video to make fun of mom the other day because she wanted to hide something when my sister and her partner were coming to visit for two short days this past weekend. god forbid people know we eat food in this house!!!!
anyway this is the floor in their house in the north facing room on a cloudy day:
it is absolutely beautiful but dear god I don't know if it was worth all this.
we moved the living room stuff yesterday, my dad had decided to pack the books in my room last night for some baffling reason. Apparently he and mom were having miscommunications on what was going over when. I really really didn't want him doing this since my belongings are mixed in with their stuff in my room, so there's a big risk of them packing my stuff up with theirs and then I'll never see it again. I think I've convinced them to not touch my room. Current task is for me to clean my room enough that we can get the bedframe out since it is their bedframe and mine is over at their house, so we need to swap them. to be fair, my bedframe is very low since I have a boxspring so them continuing to use the low frame for their mattress doesn't make sense. it would be for a guest bed, not their bed. they are using a shit mattress from an eternity ago, I don't know if I'll ever convince them to get a new one. no idea where the fuck I'm putting any of my shit to make this happen.
so yay task for me. I think I convinced them to leave the kitchen stuff alone until my mom orders a new stove because my dad wanted to swap the dishwashers today for some reason??? I don't know. He really wants to move everything at once, but is not thinking logically or reasonably about it at all. we may move the fridge over today which means I'll need to go get the fridge from the pole barn. it's been out there since we ripped the floor out of their house in Jan of last year. so who knows what condition it's in.
they want some stuff moved over for my dad's college buddies coming to visit the weekend of the 22nd but not too much. my dad wanted to get the foosball table out of the basement, I told him absolutely fucking not. truly no idea what is happening and I'm too tired for this. I will simply show up to pick up heavy things. like great, they are finally doing the thing but holy fuck is it happening with maximum chaos.
oh also I got to say quote Chris Fleming's video to make fun of mom the other day because she wanted to hide something when my sister and her partner were coming to visit for two short days this past weekend. god forbid people know we eat food in this house!!!!
anyway this is the floor in their house in the north facing room on a cloudy day:
it is absolutely beautiful but dear god I don't know if it was worth all this.
continuing lessons in parental boundaries
Aug. 9th, 2026 07:09 pmI got in at 6:45pm having worked from 7:30am to then with only a quick 30 min break in the house for lunch (to be fair, a big chunk of my day was working the register so it wasn't exactly a strenuous day) and went upstairs to shower to discover that one of my parents had gone into my room and started packing their books that have lived on the shelf in my room for a year and a half now
milk crates of books in my doorway so I couldn't close my door
I did not know this was happening, a couple of my things had to be moved out of the way to access the shelf.
am I pleased they are finally fucking moving? yes. but I told them both: do not go in my room without asking first
because what the fuck. what the fuck!
milk crates of books in my doorway so I couldn't close my door
I did not know this was happening, a couple of my things had to be moved out of the way to access the shelf.
am I pleased they are finally fucking moving? yes. but I told them both: do not go in my room without asking first
because what the fuck. what the fuck!
June July Book Roundup
Aug. 1st, 2026 11:03 amWeird two months for me reading wise. Leaned heavily on reread audiobooks to help with mood and read a lot of fanfic. I'm on register and listening to the next Murderbot book right now while I spindle spin.
Read
DNF
Read
- The Imposition of Unnecessary Obstacles by Malka Older - it is fascinating how Older captures the vibe of Sherlock Holmes and Doyle's writing style in a completely different setting and world. It's so cool. Another good mystery, great narrator. Library audiobook
- The Language of Liars by SL Huang - hard scifi, extremely cool alien stuff, really really cool plot, deeply unsettling. library ebook
- Machine by Elizabeth Bear - I will read anything she writes. This was hard scifi, amazing characters and extremely cool plot and ideas. library ebook
- In the Lives of Puppets by TJ Klune - solid book, I liked how if you know pinoccio, you can see the similarities but the plot and stories go a bit differently. Not necessarily a happy ending book, not sad. Mixed. Enjoyable overall. library audiobook
- Like Real People Do by EL Massey - it's just nice to read a romance where everyone is trying their best. library audiobook
- Like You've Nothing to Prove by EL Massey - second in the series. library audiobook
- All Hail the Underdogs by EL Massey - third in the series. library audiobook
- All Systems Red by Martha Wells - It's just good. library audiobook
- Artificial Condition by Martha Wells - library audiobook
- Free From Falling by EL Massey - the audiobook isn't out yet :( library ebook
- Rogue Protocol by Martha Wells - library audiobook
DNF
- Black Trans Feminism by Marquis Bey - I suspect this is a book better read with the ability to take notes, not an audiobook, will try again another time. library audiobook
- The Fabric of Civilization by Virginia Postrel - good book on fabric production for someone who doesn't know a ton about the various steps or are just getting into it. I wasn't learning anything new and it was mostly making me want to do more crafting which I didn't have time for. I'd recommend it to most people though. library audiobook
- Gravity Lost by LM Sagas - I enjoyed the first one but this one upped the smarm level and it irritated me too much. library audiobook
- Shots on Net by JJ Mulder - listen, you can't just say the trope in the book. You can't! It's not good writing! library audiobook
- The Thousand Names by Django Wexler - I gotta say, Wexler has range. this is so wildly different than all the other books of theirs I've read. The first half of the book is intense 1800s style warfare writing and it's good and compelling to read about how hellish it is and how everyone is trying to survive it. I usually finish a book once I read past the first half but once the characters left the battle and the colonizers won, they became much less interesting and also the romance started to annoy me. I probably should have finished it but I'm feeling very meh on it, so maybe someday I'll come back to it. I also know there's more in the series after and I'm not sure I'm that interested. library ebook
- A Well Organized Life by 409_conflict - I adored the characterization in this story.
- It starts in an elevator by Sporkess - great series canon divergence where Iiya and Yuna get stuck in an elevator together
- something you can fix by some1_around - series. I kept away from this fic for a long while because I couldn't handle the outing plot. But holy shit it is so good and really well done.
it might be happening???
Aug. 1st, 2026 06:52 ammy dad has rented a sander for today, so the floors at their house must be sanded today. and then the finish and seal must be applied pretty quickly.
it might be happening!!!
it might be happening!!!
The blueberries are at full blast, so we have been open a lot of hours. A neighbor offered her help with register in exchange for berries and tomatoes, so I have taken her up on it. thank goodness. I spent the two weeks after the 4th of July working a ton of hours trying to get things done and mostly succeeded. Everything has been planted and fertilized, it's all downhill from here. The corn maze was the big thing, got it in the ground later than I wanted but it is in the ground. I have been eating a lot of blueberries. Need to eat more, they are so good this year and we have so many.
today I started my day at 6am and will end at 8pm with a 30 min lunch break and a 20 min zone out sitting in the shade around 2pm. I'm ready to sleep now but no such luck. I have not been listening to much beyond music these two weeks, for some reason it is now music time for my brain. I'm good with it. Emotional state is head empty, only music so that's kinda nice. not a lot of room for anxiety. not a lot of room for typing up posts.
the weather has been glorious for working and existing. a whole week in the 70s! it's up to 80 today but I'll take it. We got a whole 1/2 inch of rain the other day bringing our three month rain total to 7 inches, 3 of which came in a single weekend. it's dry. so many of the storms have split around us, multiple which have rained heavily on the towns 5 miles away but missed us completely. one of our water filters went down which adds another irritation to irrigate that section of the farm, so now I need to move a pump and a filter over there to water those strawberries. ugh. not sure what happened with the filter but it no longer seals properly, it deformed somehow. we also can't run the irrigation while customers are in the berries because the pipes are too much of a trip hazard so I'm down to 2 blocks watered a day if that. I'm hoping for more rain coming soon but I don't want to jinx it.
yesterday I forced myself to leave the farm and go be social in person. I almost didn't go because I was tired and cranky. I drove up to a local bookstore which was doing its first crafting hour that was in the city 45 mins away. I'm so glad I went in the end, it was a delight. There wasn't a ton of people but we all sat around and chatted a bit while working on things and there was music for when we weren't chatting. Knitting and crochet but some people were scrapbooking and one person brought wirework so there was some good discussions on various topics.
One person recognized me from the farm, so that is a mixed bag. On one hand, cool. On the other, I would have though I'd be more anonymous given the distance. I guess there aren't that many PYO farms in the area... but overall nice time and absolutely worth the drive. it's been years since I was up in that city too, so it was interesting to see the downtown. I think it's been revitalized from rust belt city stuff and it was clean and neat and a bunch of the buildings had been upgraded or repaired well.
I'm really trying for more in person interaction. I really appreciate all the online stuff I'm able to do and feel like I'm maybe acting as if my online crafting nights aren't good enough. but my in-person interactions are literally just my parents and customers right now and I do really need in-person stuff to be a functional human being. A big thing I'm super aware of is the lack of support that comes from not dating. dating someone generally allows for that automatic help in so many ways that are big and small. friendship networks like I had in NY can compensate for it pretty darn well but I don't have that here and that becomes a huge issue at some point in the mid distant future. like, if I can get top surgery, who would I ask to help me with that? no one local currently. but if I was in NY, there would be at least two people I could have asked. so I need to get to that point here. And like, the normal friendship reasons like spending time with people.
god I can't believe it's almost august.
today I started my day at 6am and will end at 8pm with a 30 min lunch break and a 20 min zone out sitting in the shade around 2pm. I'm ready to sleep now but no such luck. I have not been listening to much beyond music these two weeks, for some reason it is now music time for my brain. I'm good with it. Emotional state is head empty, only music so that's kinda nice. not a lot of room for anxiety. not a lot of room for typing up posts.
the weather has been glorious for working and existing. a whole week in the 70s! it's up to 80 today but I'll take it. We got a whole 1/2 inch of rain the other day bringing our three month rain total to 7 inches, 3 of which came in a single weekend. it's dry. so many of the storms have split around us, multiple which have rained heavily on the towns 5 miles away but missed us completely. one of our water filters went down which adds another irritation to irrigate that section of the farm, so now I need to move a pump and a filter over there to water those strawberries. ugh. not sure what happened with the filter but it no longer seals properly, it deformed somehow. we also can't run the irrigation while customers are in the berries because the pipes are too much of a trip hazard so I'm down to 2 blocks watered a day if that. I'm hoping for more rain coming soon but I don't want to jinx it.
yesterday I forced myself to leave the farm and go be social in person. I almost didn't go because I was tired and cranky. I drove up to a local bookstore which was doing its first crafting hour that was in the city 45 mins away. I'm so glad I went in the end, it was a delight. There wasn't a ton of people but we all sat around and chatted a bit while working on things and there was music for when we weren't chatting. Knitting and crochet but some people were scrapbooking and one person brought wirework so there was some good discussions on various topics.
One person recognized me from the farm, so that is a mixed bag. On one hand, cool. On the other, I would have though I'd be more anonymous given the distance. I guess there aren't that many PYO farms in the area... but overall nice time and absolutely worth the drive. it's been years since I was up in that city too, so it was interesting to see the downtown. I think it's been revitalized from rust belt city stuff and it was clean and neat and a bunch of the buildings had been upgraded or repaired well.
I'm really trying for more in person interaction. I really appreciate all the online stuff I'm able to do and feel like I'm maybe acting as if my online crafting nights aren't good enough. but my in-person interactions are literally just my parents and customers right now and I do really need in-person stuff to be a functional human being. A big thing I'm super aware of is the lack of support that comes from not dating. dating someone generally allows for that automatic help in so many ways that are big and small. friendship networks like I had in NY can compensate for it pretty darn well but I don't have that here and that becomes a huge issue at some point in the mid distant future. like, if I can get top surgery, who would I ask to help me with that? no one local currently. but if I was in NY, there would be at least two people I could have asked. so I need to get to that point here. And like, the normal friendship reasons like spending time with people.
god I can't believe it's almost august.
Friday afternoon, my aunt hosted the 4th party. I'm really unsure why friday at 2pm was the time, but I closed up the register at 1, did some plowing, ran the irrigation pumps, then showered and headed up. The heat was miserable to work in all week and a lot of my time was spent running irrigation.
The party wasn't any cooler, my aunt and uncle don't have AC, not even window units so their house was pretty warm even with the fans running. Most of us just migrated to their porch because it was just as warm outside as in and there was a decent breeze plus a view of the orchard. A small storm rolled through but it didn't even do a tenth of an inch but it hailed 20 mins away so I'm okay with it. I left around 7 to do tractor setup for the neighbor to help me and went to bed early after my mom decided to have a lot of feelings about the upcoming trip at me. I did not appreciate this, I was so tired. Being cranky back wouldn't do anything, so I just went to sleep.
Saturday, we were open, I still haven't gotten someone to cover weekends, so I was on register. It was only 85F, positively cool! But I got up early to finish the plowing, wrapping it up just before we opened at 8 and by the time I got off work at 1pm, I was already tired. But I ran the irrigation for an hour, packed, put away all the equipment that shouldn't get wet, then pulled the pumps, showered and hit the road to my brother's. I almost didn't go. I was so hot and tired.
The drive down sucked. It is becoming clear that my truck AC is not keeping up anymore and I mildly sweated all the way down the turnpike. I stopped and used the bathroom at a rest stop solely to wake myself up. Despite the day, there was basically no traffic and the drive was easy down near Philly. I arrived at my brother's place around 5pm where they reheated food for me and I ate a ton of fruit. My dad and I kept an eye on the weather back home via the weather station app and the radar, which was 0.6 inches of rain in 20 mins plus high winds. I have to go out this afternoon and start cleanup on some of that.
We hung out, watched the thunderstorms that rolled through, I got the tour of their new place which was absolutely beautiful and cool. The younger crowd of us stayed up until 1am playing Bomb Busters which is basically fancy collaborative go fish. It was a lot of fun!
I slept in until 9am on the couch but was one of the first up anyway. I got lots of dog snuggles, ate brownies for breakfast (absolutely amazing gluten free brownies) and we all slugged around until after lunch. I hit the road, taking the long route and avoiding the turnpike and the traffic snarls on 95 and got home just about in time to get an inch and a half of rain in about 45 minutes. I had checked on the pumps and the creek levels as soon as I got home, then decided to fully pull the pumps and pipes after that rain came through. One of the creeks had risen over a foot due to the storm. It's back down now, but we still have a flood watch. Rain total for the weekend is three inches and we're getting more tonight.
We are hitting the point of desperately behind, the corn maze is not in the ground yet, there is time sensitive spraying to be done and one of my main farm employees just texted that he has a fulltime job starting next week. And my parents are out of town this week. Great. Well, oh well. I'll figure it out. Or not.
The party wasn't any cooler, my aunt and uncle don't have AC, not even window units so their house was pretty warm even with the fans running. Most of us just migrated to their porch because it was just as warm outside as in and there was a decent breeze plus a view of the orchard. A small storm rolled through but it didn't even do a tenth of an inch but it hailed 20 mins away so I'm okay with it. I left around 7 to do tractor setup for the neighbor to help me and went to bed early after my mom decided to have a lot of feelings about the upcoming trip at me. I did not appreciate this, I was so tired. Being cranky back wouldn't do anything, so I just went to sleep.
Saturday, we were open, I still haven't gotten someone to cover weekends, so I was on register. It was only 85F, positively cool! But I got up early to finish the plowing, wrapping it up just before we opened at 8 and by the time I got off work at 1pm, I was already tired. But I ran the irrigation for an hour, packed, put away all the equipment that shouldn't get wet, then pulled the pumps, showered and hit the road to my brother's. I almost didn't go. I was so hot and tired.
The drive down sucked. It is becoming clear that my truck AC is not keeping up anymore and I mildly sweated all the way down the turnpike. I stopped and used the bathroom at a rest stop solely to wake myself up. Despite the day, there was basically no traffic and the drive was easy down near Philly. I arrived at my brother's place around 5pm where they reheated food for me and I ate a ton of fruit. My dad and I kept an eye on the weather back home via the weather station app and the radar, which was 0.6 inches of rain in 20 mins plus high winds. I have to go out this afternoon and start cleanup on some of that.
We hung out, watched the thunderstorms that rolled through, I got the tour of their new place which was absolutely beautiful and cool. The younger crowd of us stayed up until 1am playing Bomb Busters which is basically fancy collaborative go fish. It was a lot of fun!
I slept in until 9am on the couch but was one of the first up anyway. I got lots of dog snuggles, ate brownies for breakfast (absolutely amazing gluten free brownies) and we all slugged around until after lunch. I hit the road, taking the long route and avoiding the turnpike and the traffic snarls on 95 and got home just about in time to get an inch and a half of rain in about 45 minutes. I had checked on the pumps and the creek levels as soon as I got home, then decided to fully pull the pumps and pipes after that rain came through. One of the creeks had risen over a foot due to the storm. It's back down now, but we still have a flood watch. Rain total for the weekend is three inches and we're getting more tonight.
We are hitting the point of desperately behind, the corn maze is not in the ground yet, there is time sensitive spraying to be done and one of my main farm employees just texted that he has a fulltime job starting next week. And my parents are out of town this week. Great. Well, oh well. I'll figure it out. Or not.
I am good at farming
Jul. 1st, 2026 10:45 amthis morning I broke one of the sprayers in a way that my dad has literally never seen before.
the glass front pressure gauge on the top of the sprayer spontaneously shattered its face about 30 seconds after I turned the pto/pressure on. my dad sprayed with it last night and nothing hit it or was laying on it. I can't find the missing glass chunks anywhere
(I was several feet and facing away and also I wear goggles for mixing chemicals)
so I just capped it and sprayed anyway since we knew the pressure was fine but also
how
the glass front pressure gauge on the top of the sprayer spontaneously shattered its face about 30 seconds after I turned the pto/pressure on. my dad sprayed with it last night and nothing hit it or was laying on it. I can't find the missing glass chunks anywhere
(I was several feet and facing away and also I wear goggles for mixing chemicals)
so I just capped it and sprayed anyway since we knew the pressure was fine but also
how
well there was supposed to be a break...
Jun. 24th, 2026 04:38 pmthe raspberries are ripe a week or so early. I was hoping for a break between strawberry and raspberry picking but uhh. nope. the early blueberries are just about ready too, I ate the first one today. this is way way early. we have raspberries ready to pick.
this morning first thing (on the tractor and in the field by 6am) I finished the between-plastic-mulch spray that took me three tries because I broke the sprayer twice in two different ways that were easily fixed but if the fix takes more than an hour, I have to delay until the next morning or evening since it needs to be dead calm. my to-spray list is four items long. much to do. my afternoon break has been sending the email newsletter, facebook page, website, answering machine update about the raspberries and figuring out what the schedule for the rest of the summer will look like. we are going to be open part of sunday but I'll be able to get to pride after we close. I have to spray again tonight to finish the 3 acres of pumpkins on mulch if the wind dies down although it's pretty breezy right this minute.
it's fine. my sister was in town visiting for the last few days and what a gosh darn delight to see her again. She took some of the pressure off me by spending time with my mom and helping her around the house and also made us food.
She also did some lovely support for me as well, by listening to me rant about the parents for 45 mins and also her and her partner came with me to home depot and the grocery store monday to help me not have a mental breakdown in the store which helped so much. there was one point in the grocery where I was covering my face with my hands while they found the stuff they needed for chili but we got out of there pretty quickly after that so it was fine. home depot was fine, I had no issues there. why are grocery stores so terrible. surely someone has done the science on this. they're the worst. actually walmart is the worst but grocery stores are a close second.
apparently Z's support was all I needed to get me through the week because I haven't felt this calm or focused in about two months and I've been tackling my to do list this week and it's going well. support? helping??? wild. I think I haven't been ranting to friends or on the crafting zoom because there's only so many times that I want to complain and I'm sure listening to me complain about the same stuff over and over gets dull. so I type it all in here and you can respond if you want or tell me sister who has heard it before but not for a couple months.
anyway, I need to go fill the sprayer and put out cones to mark ripe raspberry rows and maybe take a quick nap
this morning first thing (on the tractor and in the field by 6am) I finished the between-plastic-mulch spray that took me three tries because I broke the sprayer twice in two different ways that were easily fixed but if the fix takes more than an hour, I have to delay until the next morning or evening since it needs to be dead calm. my to-spray list is four items long. much to do. my afternoon break has been sending the email newsletter, facebook page, website, answering machine update about the raspberries and figuring out what the schedule for the rest of the summer will look like. we are going to be open part of sunday but I'll be able to get to pride after we close. I have to spray again tonight to finish the 3 acres of pumpkins on mulch if the wind dies down although it's pretty breezy right this minute.
it's fine. my sister was in town visiting for the last few days and what a gosh darn delight to see her again. She took some of the pressure off me by spending time with my mom and helping her around the house and also made us food.
She also did some lovely support for me as well, by listening to me rant about the parents for 45 mins and also her and her partner came with me to home depot and the grocery store monday to help me not have a mental breakdown in the store which helped so much. there was one point in the grocery where I was covering my face with my hands while they found the stuff they needed for chili but we got out of there pretty quickly after that so it was fine. home depot was fine, I had no issues there. why are grocery stores so terrible. surely someone has done the science on this. they're the worst. actually walmart is the worst but grocery stores are a close second.
apparently Z's support was all I needed to get me through the week because I haven't felt this calm or focused in about two months and I've been tackling my to do list this week and it's going well. support? helping??? wild. I think I haven't been ranting to friends or on the crafting zoom because there's only so many times that I want to complain and I'm sure listening to me complain about the same stuff over and over gets dull. so I type it all in here and you can respond if you want or tell me sister who has heard it before but not for a couple months.
anyway, I need to go fill the sprayer and put out cones to mark ripe raspberry rows and maybe take a quick nap
May book roundup
Jun. 3rd, 2026 09:04 pmI read a lot this month given I also was inhaling Heated Rivalry fanfics including re-reading a bunch of the longer ones. I've really been enjoying the fics, and contemplating if there's a way to watch the series without having to experience the "wet mouth noises".
Read
Read
- The Rider, the Ride, the Rich Man's Wife by Premee Mohamed - what a cool story. Very fairy tale vibes. library e-book
- Platform Decay by Martha Wells - Murderbot's no good terrible horrible very bad day. Such big feelings, I laughed so much at this book. I also re-read it immediately. I want to get an omnibus of all the books. Someday when I have more money. library ebook
- The Butcher's Masquerade by Matt Dinnaman - these books are getting longer and more complicated. Thankfully, the author does explain things. library ebook
- Felix Navidad by Nathan Burgoine - I got this out thinking it was a romance novella and it was at best, a short story. It was sad and queer and soft. library ebook
- Real Queer America by Samantha Allen - loved this book. It was definitely aimed at not-queer people but the stories were very good. It was written in 2019 and sitting here in 2026, some of the discussions feel real horrible now. It took me a bit to listen to all of this honestly, sometimes I could only listen for a half hour at a time. But the author did a great job reading her own book and it was nice to think about her and her friend driving all over while I was driving the tractors and things. library audiobook
- A Little Village Blend by Nathan Burgoine - another short story romance. basically the structure is meet cute setup, they decide to start dating, first kiss, small epilogue. Very queer so that was nice. But I'm not going to read more because such short stories don't really do it for me. library e-book
- The Eye of the Bedlam Bride by Matt Dinniman - this one was particularly good. On one hand, I know the protag will survive. On the other, shit is going down and even if the protag survives, he might not want to. ~trauma!~ things are getting real epic and I'm really enjoying them. library ebook
- A Morbid Taste for Bones by Ellis Peters - ye olde murder mystery. enjoyed this a lot, a monk who had a wild adventurous youth starts solving murders. there's apparently a billion of them in the series, so I'll probably work through them.
- The King Must Die by Kemi Ashing-Giwa - I think this book was not for me. Interesting premise, I found the protag vaguely annoying so decided it wasn't my jam. Maybe I'll come back to it someday. library ebook
great successes
May. 23rd, 2026 01:23 pmsuccesses is a terrible word to type out.
Thursday, I planted tomatoes and peppers into our vegetable beds by myself. Black biodegradable mulch. Fantastic stuff. At the end of the season, we simply plow it under and it degrades. It's made of corn or something. I love it so much. All the benefits of black plastic mulch with so much less of the downsides of having to pull it up at the end of the season. Certified organic farms can't use it, so sucks to be them and it is thinner than conventional black plastic so it'll rip more. But it's amazing. Anyway.
I ordered trays of plants from KubePak, a greenhouse in NJ. We don't have the starting space for the number of trays we need for all the plants, so we order from them. (I have a someday dream of building a 20x20 greenhouse because it could be heated by our woodburning stove. But the only good spot would be near the road where we park our rolling selling thingy, so it would be nice if it had a little selling area attached and it could be a year round little store....anyway, we don't have a lot of seed starting space) It can be pricey, but their plant quality is top tier and they have decent options for commercial growers. In case the gardeners are curious about our mix of plants, I ordered:
6 50count trays of Mariana (plum/paste tomato)
2 50 count trays of La Roma (plum/paste tomato)
1 50 count tray of Biltmore (slicer tomato)
1 50 count tray of Amish paste (big paste tomato, experiment)
3 50 count trays of Revolution II (green bell pepper)
1 50 count tray of Jalapenos
1 50 count tray of Carmen (Italian stuffing pepper)
1 105 count tray of Barbarella (Italian eggplant)
Plus, I had four trays of tomatoes and peppers that I seeded in smaller amounts (5-15 plants) and a tray of herbs. I started typing it all out but it's a lot of different varieties. The reasoning is that some folks like to use the other varieties since they have much better flavor for more fresh use. It's nice to have a bunch of different colors of tomato and also some weird varieties like Costoluto Genovese and Black Krim. For peppers, I seed some extra hot peppers and a bunch of different shape sweet peppers. I tried two more eggplant varieties and some tomatillos. Herbs are basil, dill, cilantro and parsley.
I planted the tomatoes all in before lunch and the peppers, eggplants and herbs after lunch, plus using the plastic push planter to seed one bed of green beans, 20 ft sections of purple and yellow wax beans and shell and snap peas. We ended up with about 120 extra feet in the tomato block so I might seed in some more for funsies. I've got more herbs to seed in as well since I'm doing a couple plantings of those.
In total, around 1000 plants. I was extremely sore by the end of the day and the next morning, but my little stretching routines seems to help a lot.
Friday, I organized a cookout. Jade is away tonight, so my original plan was to do it tonight, but given the weather today, I'm glad I changed it. On Monday, I texted the extended local family that we were having a cookout Friday night, 5:30ish, I'd have hot dogs, buns and smores fixings and they should all bring something if they wanted. We set up in the pavilion behind the church, I forked picnic tables out around the firepits that we set up. I brought over all the food and camp chairs around 4:45, got the fire going at 5 and was cooking my first cheese kielbasa over the fire by 5:30.
It was solid, everyone brought a ton of food including gluten free snickerdoodles which were delicious! I think my great aunt brought they specially for me which was very nice. My aunt brought her gluten free brownie recipe which is not very good but I eat one anyway and regret it. It has almond flour in it and you can tell. The grocery store now carries gluten free graham crackers so I finally had proper smores instead of my usual which is two pieces of chocolate sandwiching a marshmallow.
I ate so much food, hung out and then cleaned up and was out of there and back to the house by 10pm. Solid. Very good party, very pleased with how it went. Currently basking in "I'm a good party host" and I have lots of food to eat including so much fruit.
This morning I slept in so hard. It was so nice. The rain started overnight, so not much tractor work to be done. I'm somewhat working today, doing some computer work research and then drywall in the upstairs bathroom. I think I'm finally going to start spackling!
My mom was going to an estate sale and invited me along which was good because she would have bailed without me. Estate sales in this area are packed, so many people go to them. We picked up lots of useful tool stuff, snow shovels, jumper cables, hammers and other small things for a total of $36. Excellent.
I got some plying of old samples done over the last few days since I need to free up storage bobbins, so that's been going well. I finally remembered to make center pull balls instead of winding plying bracelets so I don't need to be attached to the yarn for so long. But it takes longer to wind, so sometimes I still do the plying bracelet. I don't own a center pull ball winder, so I just use a tube and wind it on that.
Thursday, I planted tomatoes and peppers into our vegetable beds by myself. Black biodegradable mulch. Fantastic stuff. At the end of the season, we simply plow it under and it degrades. It's made of corn or something. I love it so much. All the benefits of black plastic mulch with so much less of the downsides of having to pull it up at the end of the season. Certified organic farms can't use it, so sucks to be them and it is thinner than conventional black plastic so it'll rip more. But it's amazing. Anyway.
I ordered trays of plants from KubePak, a greenhouse in NJ. We don't have the starting space for the number of trays we need for all the plants, so we order from them. (I have a someday dream of building a 20x20 greenhouse because it could be heated by our woodburning stove. But the only good spot would be near the road where we park our rolling selling thingy, so it would be nice if it had a little selling area attached and it could be a year round little store....anyway, we don't have a lot of seed starting space) It can be pricey, but their plant quality is top tier and they have decent options for commercial growers. In case the gardeners are curious about our mix of plants, I ordered:
6 50count trays of Mariana (plum/paste tomato)
2 50 count trays of La Roma (plum/paste tomato)
1 50 count tray of Biltmore (slicer tomato)
1 50 count tray of Amish paste (big paste tomato, experiment)
3 50 count trays of Revolution II (green bell pepper)
1 50 count tray of Jalapenos
1 50 count tray of Carmen (Italian stuffing pepper)
1 105 count tray of Barbarella (Italian eggplant)
Plus, I had four trays of tomatoes and peppers that I seeded in smaller amounts (5-15 plants) and a tray of herbs. I started typing it all out but it's a lot of different varieties. The reasoning is that some folks like to use the other varieties since they have much better flavor for more fresh use. It's nice to have a bunch of different colors of tomato and also some weird varieties like Costoluto Genovese and Black Krim. For peppers, I seed some extra hot peppers and a bunch of different shape sweet peppers. I tried two more eggplant varieties and some tomatillos. Herbs are basil, dill, cilantro and parsley.
I planted the tomatoes all in before lunch and the peppers, eggplants and herbs after lunch, plus using the plastic push planter to seed one bed of green beans, 20 ft sections of purple and yellow wax beans and shell and snap peas. We ended up with about 120 extra feet in the tomato block so I might seed in some more for funsies. I've got more herbs to seed in as well since I'm doing a couple plantings of those.
In total, around 1000 plants. I was extremely sore by the end of the day and the next morning, but my little stretching routines seems to help a lot.
Friday, I organized a cookout. Jade is away tonight, so my original plan was to do it tonight, but given the weather today, I'm glad I changed it. On Monday, I texted the extended local family that we were having a cookout Friday night, 5:30ish, I'd have hot dogs, buns and smores fixings and they should all bring something if they wanted. We set up in the pavilion behind the church, I forked picnic tables out around the firepits that we set up. I brought over all the food and camp chairs around 4:45, got the fire going at 5 and was cooking my first cheese kielbasa over the fire by 5:30.
It was solid, everyone brought a ton of food including gluten free snickerdoodles which were delicious! I think my great aunt brought they specially for me which was very nice. My aunt brought her gluten free brownie recipe which is not very good but I eat one anyway and regret it. It has almond flour in it and you can tell. The grocery store now carries gluten free graham crackers so I finally had proper smores instead of my usual which is two pieces of chocolate sandwiching a marshmallow.
I ate so much food, hung out and then cleaned up and was out of there and back to the house by 10pm. Solid. Very good party, very pleased with how it went. Currently basking in "I'm a good party host" and I have lots of food to eat including so much fruit.
This morning I slept in so hard. It was so nice. The rain started overnight, so not much tractor work to be done. I'm somewhat working today, doing some computer work research and then drywall in the upstairs bathroom. I think I'm finally going to start spackling!
My mom was going to an estate sale and invited me along which was good because she would have bailed without me. Estate sales in this area are packed, so many people go to them. We picked up lots of useful tool stuff, snow shovels, jumper cables, hammers and other small things for a total of $36. Excellent.
I got some plying of old samples done over the last few days since I need to free up storage bobbins, so that's been going well. I finally remembered to make center pull balls instead of winding plying bracelets so I don't need to be attached to the yarn for so long. But it takes longer to wind, so sometimes I still do the plying bracelet. I don't own a center pull ball winder, so I just use a tube and wind it on that.
